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“The Jock Itch” with Jasmine Sadry: Brandon Marshall Stabbed By His Own Woman!

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(Photo by Marc Serota/Getty Images)

(Photo by Marc Serota/Getty Images)

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DALLAS (105.3 THE FAN) Leading off my “Jock Itch” for Today: Dolphins wide receiver Brandon Marshall was stabbed over the weekend, allegedly by his own WIFE!

Geez, it looks like SOMEONE didn’t fold the laundry properly in THAT house!

Anyway, he’s being hospitalized and initially, doctors thought that she threw something at Brandon, like a vase or a lamp, and that it broke on impact.

But, based on “further review of the play,” doctors ended up finding that he indeed HAD been stabbed, but he’s going to be okay after all.

Now, this isn’t the first time that Brandon has gotten himself hurt under a bizarre cloud of confusion.

When he was in Denver, he severed an artery, tendons, and nerves in his arms after…crashing through a TV. He initially claimed that he’d fallen victim to a McDonald’s bag that he’d slipped on  (what is this, a cartoon banana for goddsakes???)

He later admitted to wrestling with a family member.

Oh yeah, and there was that whole criminal trial on battery charges stemming from a former girlfriend and a DUI (two of four total arrests) numerous other domestic complaints, and getting caught up in the shooting death of cornerback Darrent Williams, when Brandon believed HE was actually the real target of the killers.

On a side note, Brandon recently said that he wanted to play in the NBA to make ends meet during the lockout…www.espn.com

And in OTHER “itch” worthy news…

Falcons wide-out, Roddy White is claiming that his jerseys are being held hostage!!!

(Somehow, I can’t stop myself from thinking about a TV screen shot of a pair of hanging jerseys–being held captive by masked, gunned terrorists–as a news ticker written in Arabic is scrolling at the bottom of the screen.)

Anyway, Roddy is claiming that he hired a guy to frame football jerseys for him and now the guy won’t give them back, instead, holding them for ransom at $10,000 grand! Roddy said that he agreed to pay $400 bucks for each framed jersey, but now he’s being told to pay $10,000 dollars or he’ll NEVER see his precious jerseys AGAIN!

A judge is trying to decide if an arrest warrant should be issued next week. www.wsbtv.com

Vikings defensive tackle, Ray Edwards, is the LATEST NFL player to be caught up in a sexting scandal!

Media Take Out is reporting that a chick ended up frontin’ him out with the sexts that they were exchanging between each other, specifically, a series of six photos that show Ray totally “owning it” and posing in front of different mirrors.

Guys, in case you were wondering: yes, both of his nipples are pierced as well. www.mediatakeout.com

The NFL is keeping FIVE teams off of the prime-time schedule!

I regret to report that if you were REALLY chomping at the bit to watch Ochocinco in prime-time, you won’t be able to, as his Bengals are one of the teams NOT being featured. The other TV losers are the Bills (no shock THERE), the Titans, Cardinals, and the Panthers.

Thirty teams will play on Christmas Eve, so the NFL can avoid having a packed schedule of Christmas Day games. www.miamiherald.com

NFL Commissioner Roger Goodell and lead negotiator Jeff Pash aren’t the only league employees getting a pay cut during this whole lockout mess.

Newsday is reporting that ALL NFL employees have taken a 12% pay cut and the size of the pay reduction will only get worse, if this lockout continues until August. On top of that, there’s rumors swirling of staff being let go at that point.

So let me get this straight: The NFL players aren’t missing their FAT game checks until September and the league’s 32 owners are sitting comfortably through this all, but the NFL team employees, who mostly make a WHOPPING five figure salary, are the ones taking it on the chin?

Yep, sounds completely justified to me! www.profootballtalk.com

Major League Baseball meets the WWE??

Well, sort of.

Baseball fans; it looks like Sunday Night Baseball on ESPN just isn’t what it seems!

A guy named Jon Miller spent 21 years working the package of games with Joe Morgan, and he’s dishing the dirt, saying that regardless of what was going on in the game itself, ESPN had to stick with the pre-game scripts!

The NY Post says that Jon claimed that even in a tie game in the late innings, ESPN producers demanded what would be broadcast. His quote: “The people in charge would prepare all this stuff and the telecast was all about getting all this stuff in!”

No word on whether the next step is to add tacky face paint, a singlet, or folding chairs… www.nypost.com

Oooh boy, Dodgers’ owner Frank McCourt is REALLY going to have to get some PR help with this one. Apparently, relatives of the Giants fan that was beaten to a bloody pulp at Dodger Stadium on opening day and left in a coma say that Frank waited TWO weeks after the incident to even contact Bryan Stow’s mom! They also claim that the phone call was not very heartfelt, feeling more business-like than anything else, AND that Frank is a selfish “bottom line” kinda guy that doesn’t give two flying flips about the security of the baseball fans in his own team’s stadium!

Not shocking with this tidbit of info, but the Stows are reportedly ELATED to see McCourt’s epic downfall right now too!

Karma is a B****, Frank. It really is. www.radaronline.com

The rumor mill is swirling with news that A-Rod is trying to make an honest woman out of his girlfriend, Cameron Diaz! He’s been reportedly seen engagement ring shopping inNew York!

Now, this is after he’s been completely smitten with Cam, allowing her to feed him popcorn at the Super Bowl this year and even moving her into his house in Miami so that she can be closer to him and his daughters!

In the past, Cam has confessed that she wasn’t looking to settle down anytime soon and was also quoted as saying that she flies anywhere for the c**k!

A-Rod: this one’s a keeper… www.contactmusic.com

The mad hate for Kevin Garnett is continuing, this time courtesy of an anonymous player on ESPN’s Player X blog!

Way to be ballsy and call out KG under an anonymous guise, Player X!

Anyway, here’s what this “anonymous player X” is calling KG out on! He says, “Garnett is a punk and a coward. I know, I know. Easy for me to say behind this column. Don’t worry, I’ll tell him to his face, too. And I’m not the only one who thinks that: If you’re not on his team, chances are you hate the guy. You can learn a lot about him by watching his eyes. If he’s talking to you — and he’s always talking — he avoids eye contact. My advice to other guys in the league: Stare him down, and he’ll retreat. From what I’ve seen, he’ll never mix it up with a player who’s bigger than he is. Personally, I think he’s scared to fight — like a playground bully who barks but doesn’t bite.”

Yowza!

I mean, it’s no secret that the Celtics are some of the most blatant trash talkers in the league, which I guess makes sense if you’re a championship team. Ray Allen got nasty in Boston and Paul Pierce will literally look at you and mouth, “Stop THIS!”

Yet another reason to hate a Boston team… www.espn.com

And finally…

Our adorable little horny Mormon, BYU’s Brandon Davies is officially expected to suit up next season for the men’s basketball team!

If you remember, his crotch caused quite the tizzy during March Madness this year, after he admitted to violating the school’s honor code by (gasp!) HAVING PREMARITAL SEX WITH A GIRL! (Although, the story ALSO adds that he actually knocked up the daughter of a BYU professor!)

Brandon says that he’s “looking forward to coming back to school to continue his education and getting back on the court;” and by “court,” he means his professor’s daughter.

Anyway, BYU’s honor code requires that students live a “chaste and virtuous life, be honest, abstain from alcoholic beverages, tobacco, tea, coffee, and substance abuse; and attend church regularly.”

Somebody BETTER make sure this boy stays away from chicks and cola or it COULD get ugly…www.huffingtonpost.com

And THAT’s my “Jock Itch!”

J

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