Whether you’ve reached the end of your rope or merely the end of your week, welcome to Whitt’s End:
*After that 15-4 start that had the Metroplex on the edge of its seat with every pitch, the buzz over the Texas Rangers has at least momentarily dulled. Since then the Rangerzzzzz are only 12-14. Josh Hamilton hasn’t homered in 11 games and over 50 at-bats. Amazingly, they still have a comfortable lead in the AL West.
*Vegas’ first odds of the NFL season are out. Cowboys’ over/under for wins is 8.5. Give me the over. Way over.
*Lamar Odom is gone from the Mavs, but his ashes are an asset. Expect him – and other players, etc. – to be traded before the June 28 draft, for Paul Pierce, Pau Gasol or perhaps Atlanta’s Josh Smith.
*Cowboys’ fans aren’t supposed to be happy when opponents get injured, because of karma or something. Screw that. Think the Giants were sad when Demarco Murray went down last year? And what’d it get ‘em? Super Bowl. I applaud Hakeem Nicks’ broken foot. At the very least, he’ll miss the season opener vs. Dallas Sept. 5.
*Saw The Dictator last night. Spoiler alert: Damn skippy. If you are easily offended by non-politically correct language please go see it, because I love it when you people are offended. Favorite line: “I guess I want to apologize for some of the things I said about Captain Hook and blackie.” You’ll giggle.
*Memorial Day honors those American military killed in battle; Veteran Day honors those who have served.
*With HBO needing a decision by June 1, the Cowboys are still in play for Hard Knocks. Stay tuned.
*Happy birthday, RAGE. It was two years ago that I did my last radio show with Newy Scruggs, giving way to my partnership with Greg Williams. At The Fan’s 3rd annual Memorial Day party this Monday we’ll be live and local all day, with roundtables of rotating hosts from 10a-6p. Save me some barbecue.
*Fight I’ll never win but also never surrender: It’s Dirk No-Witz-ki. I’ve asked him, have you? He pronounces it with a W. Latest irrational explanation is that he changed the pronunciation – from the German V for W – just to appease big, dumb Americans who were too lazy to say it right. But, listen, I’d say 9 of 10 people say No-Vitz-ki. So, what’s his motivation at this point: To say his name wrong when the majority is saying it right? To continue to attempt to fix something that ain’t broken? Or, perhaps he’s been saying it right all along. Duh.
*So I go online to renew my car registration and it’s $65.25, plus a $2 convenience fee. Wait a minute, convenience fee? Not a bigger rip-off in this world. We’re being charged for someone sitting at a computer and clicking, rather than a person physically opening an envelope?
*French Open > Indy 500. My favorite tennis major, because it’s the most difficult to win. Seven matches over 13 days in the searing heat and grueling clay of Paris. Fantastic theater.
*As a guy who was raised Southern Baptist, this disgusts me. In other words, I’m totally against this preacher.
*Memorial Day is Monday, otherwise known as the 1-year anniversary of when an inebriated Richie Whitt slurred his infamous “Whazzup FanFannzzz” on 105.3 The Fan. Encore? Doubtful.
*An inmate from the Coffield Unit in Tennessee Colony, Texas writes me a letter every month. Doesn’t directly threaten me, but details how he’s violent and how he’s escaped from prison three times already. Wants me to “shut the f*ck about calling inmates pieces of sh*t.” Funny, because I’ve never once said that.
*If it’s good enough for Peter Griffin it’s good enough for me. So, when someone makes reference to an object, any object – chair, football helmet, lunch menu – retort thisaway: “Is that like an iPad?” Good times.
*In case you missed it and want to see how truly dorky RAGE is, our TV commercial is right here.
*New 105.3 The Fan lineup beginning June 4. Two words: Hubba. Hubba.
*Get well soon, Greggo.
*This weekend? Today we’re at Al Lamb Honda in Dallas on 635 celebrating Memorial Day. Saturday it’s a double-header, first at Vandergriff Honda in Arlington Noon-2 then Baby Dolls on Northwest Highway for UFC 146 9-??? Sunday, the Sabbath. Don’t be a stranger.
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