White House Responds To Petition For Death Star
WASHINGTON D.C. (CBSDFW.COM) – The White House issued an official response to a petition calling for the United States government to “Secure resources and funding, and begin construction of a Death Star by 2016.”
Their answer? It’s simply too expensive.
The Star Wars themed petition was submitted on the government sponsored site “We the People” and received 34,435 signatures, more than the 25,000 required to prompt an official response from the White House.
“The Administration shares your desire for job creation and a strong national defense, but a Death Star isn’t on the horizon,” says the statement prepared by Paul Shawcross, Chief of the Science and Space Branch at the White House Office of Management and Budget.
The statement also references a Lehigh University study, which estimates the cost of a Death Star at $850,000,000,000,000,000, or $850 quadrillion. “We’re working hard to reduce the deficit, not expand it.”
The White House also questioned why one would meet the hefty price tag for a structure “with a fundamental flaw that can be exploited by a one-man starship,” referencing the fall of the Death Star at the hands of Luke Skywalker.
And according to the White House, the United States isn’t entirely void of the futuristic technology which the Death Star possesses.
“We don’t have a Death Star, but we do have floating robot assistants on the Space Station, a President who knows his way around a light saber and advanced (marshmallow) cannon, and the Defense Advanced Research Projects Agency, which is supporting research on building Luke’s arm, floating droids, and quadruped walkers,” noted the White House.
But the messsage is clear. There will be no destructive galactic weapon constructed – or at least not a Death Star.
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