Okay 3rd graders, let’s get this out of the way: Danica Patrick is sitting on the pole. (Giggity.)
I’ll be watching (in person, actually) when the 1st female of NASCAR turns the Super Bowl of stock car racing into The Danicatona 500 on Sunday. Danica is proving – better late than never – that she’s not just a pretty face, but a pretty good driver.
When she’s got the fastest car the world will be watching. And, I’ll be honest, it takes a “special” female to make me watch women’s sports. Men generally run faster and jump higher and, I dunno, I’m just not jazzed by watching the jayvee.
But I am a red-blooded American whose testosterone is naturally attracted to excellent estrogen.
The 10 female athletes who I’ll actually make time to watch:
10. Lindsey Vonn – Tiger Woods’ new squeeze is reckless on the slopes, and off.
9. Elena Delle Donne – The Dirkstress of Delaware has legit skills.
8. Alana Blanchard – She surfs. In a thong. The end.
7. Maria Kirilenko – Women’s tennis isn’t just for the grunting.
6. Rhonda Rousey– Makes me watch MMA for an entirely different reason.
5. Brittney Griner – She plays like a dude. Must-see.
4. Kate Upton – I think I heard she’s an advanced Equestrian. Don’t really care if it’s true or not.
3. Hope Solo – Sexy and saves, in an All-American package.
2. Danica Patrick – Go Daddy indeed.
1. Serena Williams – Better athlete than she is tennis player.
Also Check Out:
- Teacher Suspended After Pouring Pencil Shavings In Student’s Mouth
- Mosquito-Fighting Plan Allows Access To Private Property With No Warrant
- “Sexually Suggestive” Exercises Center of LA Fitness Lawsuit
- Memorial Service Wraps For Chris Kyle
- Police Expand Hunt For Escaped Florida Inmate






