whitts end reaper Whitts End: 6.15.12

Whether you’ve reached the end of your rope or merely the end of your week, welcome to Whitt’s End:

  • Not sure what the answer is concerning the Rangers’ patchwork starting rotation, but I am certain it ain’t Scott Feldman. He’s 0-6 with a 7.14 ERA and hasn’t made it through the 6th inning of any start. Rangers have been outscored in his starts, 44-13. I’ve seen enough. You?
  • LeBron James tried to choke in last night’s Game 2 of the NBA Finals but the Thunder and referee Tom Washington wouldn’t let him. Down two Kevin Durant shot a turnaround jumper during which LeBron put a forearm in his chest and hooked his shooting arm with an arm. That’s a foul, that wasn’t called a foul. And to set up that possession, LeBron characteristically turned passive, dribbled out the shot clock and launched a ridiculous 25-foot 3-pointer. But give James credit, he made a tough banker in the final 1:30 and all 12 of his free throws. At the other end, Thunder stars Durant, Russell Westbrook and James Harden — all 80-percent shooters — missed a combined 6 free throws. Ball game.
  • Two local names to keep handy as the Cowboys break minicamp and await for the start of training camp July 30 in Oxnard, Calif.: North Texas running back Lance Dunbar and SMU receiver Cole Beasley. Both have turned heads at Valley Ranch.
  • Josh Hamilton is about to kill somebody. Last year around this time he playfully tossed a ball into the left-field stands, leading to the accidental and tragic death of a Brownwood firefighter. Of course that incident was not Josh’s fault. At all. But these days it’s his bat, flying into the stands after swings and misses. It’s happened three straight nights, making it 22 times on the season. He’s got the same number of homers as he does bats into the stands. Hurl 40-ounce bats into a crowd of people sipping beer, eating nachos and checking their texts long enough and someone will seriously get hurt.
  • Tiger Woods shoots 1-under at the U.S. Open. But that isn’t the story, that’s expected. The story is that a nobody named Michael Thompson leads by 3 shots. But, no, ESPN’s screaming headline this morning: “Tiger Makes Statement!” What exactly is his statement? That he’s almost as good as Michael Thompson?
  • Hot:
  • Not:
  • I’ll be tuned in tonight at 7 when Nick Wallenda — the latest in a long line of Flying Wallendas — attempts to tight-rope walk over Niagara Falls. Tight-roping is one of the most simple, yet most amazing of all stunts. Nick will, without a life jacket or safety net, walk the length of 4 football fields on a 2-inch-wide wire over 200 feet in the air. Badass.
  • Gawdalmighty Magic Johnson sucks as an NBA Finals analyst for ABC. In the wake of the Heat’s win last night Magic offered this wisdom: “The Heat are back to playing great defense and great offense. And they’re a great basketball team when they play great defense and great offense.” Great.
  • Neftali Feliz comes off the disabled list July 18. Then where does he go? Back in rotation or to bullpen? Interesting.
  • This is how it works in our Bible Belt. If you’re fat, it’s genetic; If you’re gay, it’s a lifestyle choice. Pretty sure it’s the other way around.
  • Click here if you wanna watch Rangers’ pitcher Yu Darvish singing and dancing to Shania Twain’s “Man I Feel Like a Woman.” Yikes.
  • The drug-charge cases of Roger Clemens and Lance Armstrong are similar. Both from Texas. Legends in their sports. Never failed drug tests. But somehow I’m against Clemens and for Armstrong. Something about the difference in one being a hero (Armstrong) and the other an asshole (Clemens).
  • One of the most important things the Cowboys need if they hope to be a contender in 2012: A decent safety. Been saying that since Darren Woodson retired in ’04 haven’t we? Since then the Cowboys have been polluted by safeties such as Lynn Scott, Tony Dixon, Keith Davis, Pat Watkins, Roy Williams, Ken Hamlin, Alan Ball and Abe Elam. Next up: Brodney Pool. Don’t hold your breath.
  • I applaud NBA commissioner David Stern asking Jim Rome “Have you stopped beating your wife?” One stupid question deserves another, right?
  • Last night on TV simultaneously was the NBA Finals, U.S. Open and Rangers. DVRs are a life-saver, but a buddy of mine has this set-up that at first I thought was crazy but now I’m thinking is genius. He’s bailed out of our macho race to have the biggest screen TV, and instead in his living room he’s got three medium TVs.
  • In case you missed it and want to see how truly dorky RAGE is, our TV commercial is right here.
  • Mike Jenkins = Lamar Odom?
  • Okay Toyota Tundra, we get it. You think your trucks are tough. But to give us evidence you give us TV commercials of a truck supposedly towing 9,000 pounds up a fiery roller-coaster spiral and then another in which a truck pulls a truck and a boat out of a lake? No, we’re not that stupid to believe either of those events actually happened.
  • If all those knee-jerkers would’ve gotten Hamilton signed at his peak back in early May they’d be pissed and feeling ripped off about now. Josh had 18 total bases on his historic 4-homer night in Baltimore. He has 18 total bases in all of June and his batting average has plummeted 70 points since that night.
  • Hey TCU, welcome back to the Big 12, Texas Football-style.
  • So Van Halen is rumored to be the halftime show for Super Bowl XLVII in New Orleans? I say bravo. Of course I’m 47. Wonder when the young, hip kids will feel ignored by the NFL?
  • Despite watching Game 2 I put my phone on LeBron mode: All vibrate and no ring.
  • Did a CrossFit workout Thursday with Jamie in North Arlington. Consisted of pushups, pullups, flipping a huge tractor outside in the heat, running 400 yards, and carrying a fire hose 100 yards. Twice. Kicked my butt. Check her out here. I dare ya.
  • This weekend? If you need me this weekend I’ll be out on the lake and/or playing golf with dear ol’ dad. Nonetheless, don’t be a stranger.

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