Forget College Hoops Insiders, I have THE way to pick your NCAA Brackets! This is based on a highly scientific yet chauvinistic method that I’ve coined– picking your winning schools based on how hot their chick alums are! So let’s start with part one, as I make my highly liberal, progressive mother VERY proud. Make your picks based on who is hotter to you!

Adult film actress Tera Patrick (right) is a proud Boise State alum. (Photo by Ethan Miller/Getty Images)

FIRST ROUND (March 19th/20th)

(16) North Carolina A&T vs. (16) Liberty

NCA&T– Taraji P. Henson (actress)

Liberty– Samantha Steele!!

(11) Saint Mary’s vs. (11) Middle Tennessee

St. Mary’s– Tracee Talavera (retired artistic gymnast–keep in mind, she BENDS)

Middle Tennessee– Amy Lee (Evanesence), Hillary Scott (Lady Antebellum), Ashley Eicher (Miss Tennessee 2004, and Lauren Grissom  Miss Tennessee USA 2006)

(16) LIU Brooklyn vs (16) James Madison

LIUB– Lynda Lopez (news anchor and sister of Jennifer Lopez)

James Madison– Patricia Southall (Miss Virginia USA, first runner-up Miss USA and.. MARRIED TO EMMITT SMITH!!)

(13) La Salle vs. (13) Boise State

LaSalle– Kate Hathaway (mother of Anne Hathaway– if you like Anne, her mom is the next best thing, right?)

Boise State– Tara Patrick (also known as Sadie Jordan, Brooke Thomas or Tera Hopkins–she’s a porn star)

Miss October 2001, Stephanie Heinrich, went to Cincinnati. (Photo by Bryan Haraway/Getty Images 2003)

FOR SECOND ROUND: (March 21st/22nd)

MIDWEST

(1) Louisville vs. (16) NC AT&T/Liberty

Louisville– Diane Sawyer (news anchor) and Nicole Sherzinger (Pussy Cat Dolls)

(8) Colorado State vs. (9) Missouri

Colorado State– Becky Hammon (G, WNBA San Antonio Silver Stars) and Kim Lyons (trainer in “Biggest Loser”)

Missouri– Sheryl Crowe, Kate Capshaw (actress in Indiana Jones: Temple of Doom)

(5) Oklahoma State vs. (12) Oregon

OSU–Carrie Underwood, Michele Mary Smith (ESPN softball analyst)

Oregon– Kaitlin Olson (the blond in “It’s Always Sunny in Philadelphia”) and Ann Curry (NBC anchor)

(4) Saint Louis vs. (13) New Mexico State

Saint Louis– Jan Carla Garavaglia (Dr. G Medical Examiner on Discovery Health Channel)

New Mexico State– Brittany Toll (Miss New Mexico 2011)

(6) Memphis vs. (11) Middle Tennessee/St. Mary’s

Memphis– Kellye Cash (Miss America 1987) and Ashley Durham (Miss USA 2011)

(3) Michigan State vs. (14) Valparaiso

Michigan State–Suzanne Sena (Brooke Alvarez on the Onion Network)

Valparaiso– Ginger Zee (meteorologist GMA Weekends)

(7) Creighton vs. (10) Cincinnati

Creighton– Colleen Williams (LA News Anchor)

Cincinnati– Stephanie Heinrich (Playboy model)

(2) Duke vs. (15) Albany

Duke– Kara DioGuardi (American Idol judge)

Albany– Priya Anand (Indian film actress/model)

WEST

(1) Gonzaga vs. (16) Southern University

Gonzaga– Courtney Vandersloot– (Yes, this is the best they had…WNBA’s Chicago Sky)

Southern University– Terysa Singleton (Miss Black Louisiana 2006-2007) and Brittany Brown (Miss Black Louisiana 2009-2011)

(8) Pittsburgh vs. (9) Wichita State

Pittsburgh– Nicole Johnson (Miss America 1999) and Jenna Morasca (actress/model/Survivor: Amazon winner)

Wichita State– Clara Guerrero (Colombian Bowler)

(5) Wisconsin vs. (12) Ole Miss

Wisconsin– Joan Cusack (actress)

Ole Miss– Susan Akin Lynch (Miss America 1986)

(4) Kansas State vs. (13) Boise St./LaSalle

Kansas State– Kirstie Alley (actress), Crystal Smith (Playboy centerfold)

(6) Arizona vs. (11) Belmont

Arizona– Kourtney Kardashian, Nicole Richie, Kate Walsh (actress)

Belmont–Tucker Perry (Miss USA 2010) and Rachel Smith (Miss USA 2007)

(3) New Mexico vs. (14) Harvard

New Mexico– Kelli Cornell (goalie for the Lobos Soccer Team)

Harvard– Tatyana Ali (youngest sister on Fresh Prince of Bel-Air) and Natalie Portman

(7) Notre Dame vs. (10) Iowa State

ND– Hannah Storm (ESPN anchor)

Iowa State– Mallory Snyder (SI swimsuit model/MTV’s Real World)

(2) Ohio State vs. (15) Iona

Ohio State– Patricia Heaton (mom from “Everybody Loves Raymond”)

Iona– Terry Finn (actress)

Don’t fret…Part II, to come tomorrow, has a better looking pool….

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